Monday, September 29, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Flu+migrain+fever = Bacterias JUST love me.
Why must it attack me yesterday?! It was the day which im suppose to spend time with that fella. *GODDAMMIT*..
I nearly doze off in accounts tuition. But the teacher's EYES are just TOO BIG. Keeps staring at you to keep YOU awake. [scary]
Chee Loong get bullied AGAIN in tuition. [Congrats ya dude]...AND..Chee Loong..Gambatte! Just do whatever that You Won't regret at the end-
Woot! My group won for the crossword puzzles and the drama play for ENGLISH. Tmr will be the last day Miss Fathiyah will be teaching in this school. I will miss you so much teacher! T.T I will be missing your sweets too! XD
I'm tired.
Hopeless.
I just don't know what am i thinking now.
desufnoc.
I want to pots gniyl ot felsym.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Answers To Everything
What's the best form of birth control after 50?
Nudity
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
45 lbs.
What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
45 minutes.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.
Why does the bride always wear white?
Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator.
How do you know when you're really ugly?
Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.
How do you know when you're leading a pathetic life?
When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Lets just be friends."
Why did God create alcohol?
So ugly people could have sex, too.
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"
What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
Beer Nuts are $1, and Deer Nuts are always under a buck.
What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
What's the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time." A Southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."
Sorry, this joke has too many of that 'F***' word..>>>
9 Things I Hate
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is buddy, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change the channel manually.
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the fuck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? I'm gonna Kick their ass!
5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the movies and stare at the fucking floor.
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya bitch?
7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it?
If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.
8. When people say "life is short". What the fuck?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever fucking does!!
What can you do that's longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, fuckin' dumb ass?
toilet paper
Whats dumb? Instructions on toilet paper.
Whats dumber than that? reading them.
Whats even dumber? Reading them and learning something.
Dumbest of all? Reading them and having to correct something you've been doing wrong.
a very random joke
there was a man whose name was red. he painted himself red and he painted his house red. he got in the shower. knock, knock. it was the postman. he put a towel on, went to answer the door. he got back in the shower. knock knock. it was the milkman. he put a towel on and answered the door. he went back to the shower. knock knock knock. that was mr jimmmy, the blind neighbor. he didn't put on a towel, knowing he was blind, opened the door and mr jimmy said i've got my sight back!' he then saw that red as naked so he ran across the road but got ploughed down by a truck. what is the stories morale? don't cross the road when the red man is flashing :)
Night At The Barn
A lawyer and two friends--a Rabbi, and a Hindu holy man--had car trouble in the countryside and asked to spend the night with a farmer.
The farmer said, "There might be a problem. You see, I only have room for two to sleep in the house. So one of you must sleep in the barn."
"No problem," chimed the Rabbi. "My people wandered in the desert for forty years. I am humble enough to sleep in the barn for one evening." With that he departed to the barn, and the others bedded down for the night.
Moments later a knock was heard at the door; the farmer opened the door. There stood the Rabbi from the barn. "What's wrong?" asked the farmer. He replied, "I am grateful to you, but I just can't sleep in the barn. There is a pig in the barn, and my faith believes that is an unclean animal."
His Hindu friend agrees to swap places with him. But a few minutes later the same scene reoccurs. There is a knock on the door. "What's wrong?" the farmer asks. The Hindu holy man replies, "I, too, am grateful for your helping us out, but there is a cow in the barn. In my country cows are considered sacred and I can't sleep on holy ground!"
That left only the lawyer to make the change. He grumbled and complained, but went out to the barn. Moments later there was another knock on the farmer's door. Frustrated and tired, the farmer opens the door, and there stood the pig and the cow.
Advantages Of Being A Woman
Why it's better to be a Woman!
1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.
4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.
7. Taxis stop for us.
8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.
15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.
19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.
22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.
28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.
29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.
30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.
A Man's World
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford
a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me..."
How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
Why do men break wind more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
If your dog is barking at the back door
and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman that won't do what she's told.
I married Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months:
I don't like to interrupt her.
Scientists have discovered a food
that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
Marriage is a 3-ring circus:
Engagement Ring, Wedding Ring, Suffering.
Our last fight was my fault:
My wife asked me "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!"
In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
A beggar walked up to a well-dressed woman shopping on Rodeo Drive and said,
"I haven't eaten anything for days."
She looked at him and said, "God, I wish I had your willpower."
Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
A man inserted an advertisement in the classified: "Wife Wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine."
Nathanael, this REALLY suits you.. ;P >>>
TOP TEN EXCUSES FOR FALLING ASLEEP AT YOUR DESK
1 "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
2 "I wasn't sleeping, I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands."
3 "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"
4 "Amen"
5 "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."
6 "Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper"
7 "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress."
8 "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
9 "Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"
10
"Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."
Husband's Great Gift
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.
However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty. She looked more beautiful than she ever had before! All her friends and relatives just went on and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with her husband, and she was overcome with emotion at his sacrifice. She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?"
"My darling," he replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
Men Should Listen
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells, "PIG!!"
The man immediately leans out his window and replies, "BITCH!!"
They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.
Now..this i find it quite true...
For females:
PMS stands for: Permissible Man-Slaughter (or at least men think it means that). PMS also stands for Preposterous Mood Swings and Punish My
Spouse.
For males:
Porn movies are designed with you in mind.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Are you sortof a LOA person? Get a life lah owhpulezz.. You know what..Stop bossing around me okay?! You can say whatever u want to say. But please, think before u say ANYTHING AT ALL. U may not know that you're actualy hurting people's feeling. Guess what, Maybe i don't have any courage at all to tell u what i think about you. I cared bout your feelings. Then what are friends for..?!
Maybe i dint care about u nowadays. U should understand something. U and me cant get along well. Nowadays, u kept complaining to ppl about me. You cant just stop me from making friends and joining my other friends right? I cant just stick to you. I need some space. And so do you.
But please, after what i said, i hope we still can maintain our friendship..I just need to to understand my feelings.
I cant stare at my handphone for long already. *sobs*
Screw it! Who say i cant live without handphone?! [Gosh, i can't do it]
Friday, September 12, 2008
Im back...!
AFTER 3/4 DAYS..(i guess) Miss me..?
Monday:
Flashback* I forgot what had happened that day. Let's just skip it.
Tuesday:
Owhh OWWH! Baseball! The glove stinks. And my hand is too small for it.. baseball is fun! Suitable for all ages. (:
Wednesday:
Disected that poor froggie. Justin that killer! Riyal put the chloroform on that poor froggie.
T.T
Its kinda cool disecting it. Justin was sweating like mad when disecting it. And end up acted really ganas with it. I mean, the way he disected it! Never ever let him be the surgeon next time. (:
But what still confuse us is..
Is it a male or a female?
What should i say somemore? High heels day for me. Walked like a duck. -.-
Sharon: Huiee, how u walk??
Me: Just ignore me. I just wanna walk fast.
Sharon: U seems like nvr wear high heels before le. it seems that u had a hard time wearing it.
Me: Not my first time though. Owhpulezz! The sun is burning my head!
*went to ying jin house with Nat and Ming Long*
Then we play the darting game..
Ming Long: If i dint kena the bullseye, I wont be a father next time.
Evrybody: *laughs*
Then went back to tuition for the next class.
When halfway walking..
Me: *watch the steps girl*
Suddenly....*SLIDES DOWN THE STAIRS*
Humilating enough to fall in front of everybody. And starts laughing like crazy de.
Sharon: Are u okay girl? U doesnt seems ok.
Me: Im fine. Im okay. *LAUGHES REALLY INSANELY*
Fine fine...HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA- keep on laughing. I don't care. =X
Well, Is this week meant to get myself hurt lotsa time??
1) My bruises on my knee
2) Bruises and cuts on my leg
3) Scratches on my hand
Broke my record! *woott*
Thursday:
Stayed back. Pissed my dear alittle.
Don't ever let me see that form 2 girl again.
That girl reached school late around 12.50 pm. She dare not go inside the class or either go find for pn juley or en. ismail for the surat kebenaran masuk class. Fine, me and sharon are so kind hearted enough to help her. Just know her that day only wei! Thanks to a girl. -.- Poor me and sharon. But dont know why on earth she wait till 2pm only tell us that she actually late for class! *IM SO GONNA SEPAK HER*
When we walked up the stairs she end up *suk sa* dont wanna go see teacher. Then she say she wanna ponteng school. Ask her hide in library, Tak mao pulak. -.-
Fine, Then no choice then bring her go ponteng lor. Then i pull Nat along.
Bring her go back field. Nat helped her take her stuff. Just pass it to him just like that! Tak mao pulak cause i hafta go back school early. And sharon want to go back early. Same goes to Nat.
Then we walked all the way back to front gate.
Then discuss about it. Here is how the conver goes..
Me: so how now..?
Form 2 kid: I don't know.
Sharon: U cant go to my house ler. Cause my mum dont allow.
Form 2 kid: Really cannot ar?
Me: Eh, u ponteng before ar?
Form 2 kid: Yea, with friends to KL.
Me : Fine, u go SS2 PONTENG LA. i cannot follow u ler. cause i have to balik early.
Form 2 kid: Plss...*using puppy eyes and lame cute voice trying to persuade me which is NOT working* follow me.
Sharon: Its dangerous for a girl to take a taxi there le.
Me: Then go OU ponteng lor.
Sharon: Hah?! She alone mer?!
Me: We 3 also cannot. Then thats the only way ler.
Kid: I scared ler. *gives us the cute look*
[THAT KIDDO loooks at Nat]
Kid: Can follow me?
Nat: I cant ler. I dont have money. And i need to go back already.
Kid: How u go back?
Nat: Walk back.
Kid: I follow u can? where is your house?
Nat: ERRRMM..very far wan wor. Around half and hour walk ler.
Kid: Nvm, i walk with u. I go to your house lor.
*Me and Sharon stares at him*
Me: Cannot ler. He got tuition not long. He needs to rest. And its not SWEET for a girl to go to a guy's house.
Sharon: Quite true.
Kid: *use her cute voice* Pls..? CAN teman me? *Trying to act cute*
Nat: Cannot ler.
*If Nat agree to bring her to his house, Im gonna sepak him! *I mean it! * And if she ever flirts with him again, i poke her eyeballs out man!
After that, sharon persuaded her, and finally that KID agree to go ponteng alone. [Bye! i dont wanna see u again!]
We are actually LYING that we are busy. *GRINS*
Friday:
Nothing much happen. The fish is lucky enough not to get itself killed today cause its TOO pretty! (:
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Happy birthday to Li Ann! (: Sorry for wetting u today.. :p
oohhSSHOOOT!
Modern maths homework not done yet. Crap.
Gonna disect froggie tmr! *If teacher remembers* Justin! let me disect part of it!
PLS. PLS . PLS.
Emo-ing now. Wanna slap myself for what i have done. Don't ask me questions. I don't feel like answering whatever question that is related to it.
Why must humans have the emo feeling?! T.T
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Nothing to say..
Lately, people keeps changing..
attitude..and everything!
Why cant ppl just think before they say anything?!
I might not be that way too..
I know u might say it accidentaly..or whatsoever..but..Just think!
Gosh, I dont know what am i talking about..(:
Went to Ming Tien foodcourt just now for dinner. This uncle [grampa to my brother's friend, louis] damn nice wei. He paid for me and my cousin's meal. Though we don't know how he knows what we ordered, maybe he stalked us?! O.o?! But he is a nice grampa to louis.. [lucky la thiskid]..*jealous*
Then there's this guy came to serve us our chicken rice. And then, he told us..
Guy: Yang nih dah bayar..LENGZAI
Me and cousin: *stop and stare*
When he is like 5 feet away from us already, I laughed till nearly fall of my chair. Hillarious la..its either the guy's cantonese sucks. *cant blame him la, he is a foreigner*.. Or he got problem d..XD
Then ltr, after shop for 'durians' Me and siblings went up the stairs..And i ter-hit my head somewhere. Then start laughing like a maniac. My brother was like 'Eh, jie, u okay anot?"
Seriously, my tummy was filled with laughing gas today. XD
Lately I’m not who I used to be
Someone’s come and taken me
Where I don’t wanna go
If I knew exactly what I have to do
In order to be there for you
When you were feeling low
And all the things we ever wanted
Were once yours and mine
Now, I know we can revive it
All the love we left
Everytime I kiss I feel your lips and
Everytime I cry I see your smile and
Everytime I close my eyes I realise that
Everytime I hold your hand in mine
The sweetest thing my heart could ever find
And I have never felt this way
Since the day I gave your love away
Save me, I’ve fallen from my destiny
You and I were meant to be
I’ve thrown it all away
Now you’re gone
It’s time for me to carry on
But baby I just can’t go on
Without you by my side
And all the things we ever wanted
Were once yours and mine
Now, I know we can revive it
All the love we left
Everytime I kiss I feel your lips and
Everytime I cry I see your smile and
Everytime I close my eyes I realise that
Everytime I hold your hand in mine
The sweetest thing my heart could ever find
And I have never felt this way
Since the day I gave your love away
We can survive it
All the pain we feel inside
You relied on me and now I’ve let you down
Now, I promise you forever
I will be the best I can
Now, I know we can revive it
All the love we left
Everytime I kiss I feel your lips and
Everytime I cry I see your smile and
Everytime I close my eyes I realise that
Everytime I hold your hand in mine
The sweetest thing my heart could ever find
And I have never felt this way
Since I gave your love away
Everytime I kiss I feel your lips and
Everytime I cry I see your smile and
Everytime I close my eyes I realise that
Everytime I hold your hand in mine
The sweetest thing my heart could ever find
And I have never felt this way
Since the day I gave your love away
Friday, September 5, 2008
Over some matter of course..
1) Ugh, political Problems.
2) The stupid cab just wont want to stop for us in SS2!!
3) My mum nagging...-.-
Why cant ppl treat me like a 16 year old kid?! Im like living in a forbidden world where im forbidded to go wherever i like! My choice!!! But with certain limits la durh..
U all can be right sometimes, but not all the time right..-.-
U can really shut me up whenever i talk too much or complain too much. Which u are nvr angry and well, instead by making me laugh. I know i made the right choice..(: I dint wanna care about what people might think..But just.....(: